SUCCESS COMES WITH A PRICE

... but do not let that stop you from living up to your potential.

AS STRANGE as it sounds, many people actually fear success. And this fear holds them back from achieving their goals and dreams.

But how could anyone possibly fear such a wonderfully positive thing as success? It may sound more reasonable to fear failure, so what is this all about?

Here are some reasons why people fear success:

1. Change itself is scary

It is easier to maintain status quo and go along unthinkingly. Life is easier when you can live it on autopilot. Change brings you into the unknown with its mix of exciting adventure and scary possibilities.

2. People will expect you to succeed again

There is a new pressure to perform to a level you did not have to before. You are aware of people watching and waiting for you to repeat your good performance.

3. The bar has been raised on your perfor¬mance levels

Your old habits and processes will not work. You have to change familiar and comfortable ways of doing things for the new.

4. You will get more attention from people

If you are a private person. or are not used to having an audience, being in the limelight will take some adjusting to.

5. Your private life may suffer
Athletes and actors who make it big complain that they no longer have privacy, and that they must hire security personnel and worry about financial and personal safety issues.
6. You question if you can do it again

If you succeed the first time, and fail the next time, people will say it was a fluke. This puts added pressure on this second performance and takes away the value of the first perfor¬mance should you fail.
7. People expect you to “be" a certain way now

Famous stars in show business are expected to be big tippers or to sign autographs, and if they do not, are denigrated. People have a set of expectations about how you should behave in your new position.
8. It is harder to stay at the top than to get there

It was tough succeeding, but maintaining your success is usually even harder. It takes more time, more planning and with your new distractions and obligations, keeping focus is even more demanding.

9. You make enemies when you perform better than others

You may leave former peers behind, symbolically and literally. when you raise the bar. Many people may be happy for your success but some may feel slighted and envious.

10. Your time demands will change

You have less time now because maintaining new levels of performance brings new demands on your time and new experiences you have never had.

11. Being a success can limit you

When an actor makes it big in a role, he is forever remembered as that character - and if he does not manage his career well, he will become typecast.

When you do a great job on a project, you might be known as "the one" to do this job for eternity because you are "so good" at it.
12. Being a success changes your self-image

Perhaps you have always wondered if you could succeed at something. You may not have felt worthy of this success.

People may have told you. covertly or overtly, that you do not deserve success. You, at least, know your place as one who is average.

When you succeed, people will look to you for advice, leadership and as being a model of virtue, and it will forever change how you see yourself.


Do any of these reasons strike a chord with you? If you are afraid of being successful, think these points through, and seek the advice of a career coach or mentor who can help you resolve these issues.

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HOW MOTIVATES ARE YOU?

What motivate us to get up in the morning and go out to work… every day? What determines whether we take an optimistic or a pessimistic view on things? What really makes us successful? Motivation is a fascinating subject, which has intrigued researchers for decades. Motivation is a state of mind which is influenced by our environment, by those around us and of course by us.

Everyone is motivated….to do something, whether that something is to put in full day’s work and achieve a task or whether it I to do as little as possible and hopefully not be noticed. The behaviours of managers and co-worker will influence our internal state of mind, just as successful salespeople with stimulate a motivation to prescribe in the minds of their customers.

“Whether you believe that you can or whether you believe that you can’t…you’ll be absolutely right!” – Henry Ford

“The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will” – Vincent T Lombardi

So what is motivation?

In 1938, Henry Murray developed a list of human psychological needs that lead to particular personality traits. These needs, summarized below, led to further studies of motivation by others.

1. Achievement:
A person operating from this need strives to accomplish difficult tasks or to compete with others.

2. Affiliation
This person seeks to develop close relationships with others. Loyalty and friendships are important and this person enjoys working as part of a team.

3. Aggression
This need results in a tendency to attack, injure or punish others. He/She will win forcefully and will enjoy making others look bad.

4. Autonomy
Some people need to be able to independently. They to he in control of their job and will take full responsibility for results.

5. Deference
Deferential people tend to admire and support their superiors and other authority figures. They support and respect traditions.

6. Dominance
These people will seek to control their environment through attempting to influence others to accept their views and opinions. They will manipulate others to their own advantage.

7. Exhibition
The goal of this type of person is to be noticed and to elicit a reaction from others - the life and soul of the party.

8. Nurturance
Nurturing people find satisfaction in helping others who are more needy or disadvantaged than them.

9. Order
This person is highly organized, clean, neat and precise.

10. Power
A high need for power results in an attempt to control other people and resources and to seek high status in society.

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The key to success in life

Good management of one's emotions is the key to greater success in one's career and life.

Senior chartered psychologist and computer scientist from Oxford University Dr Shaun Zeng said the ability to manage such emotions depended on the health of one's emotional intelligence.

Self-discovery: Participants will learn to use their emotional intelligence at the EQ workshop on Jan 26.
He said work problems, like finding it difficult to work with others or leading co-workers as well as finding it overly challenging to meet one's work targets thus resulting in constant change of jobs, were usually symptoms of underlying emotional issues.

“If you feel unmotivated towards self-improvement or if you are generally unhappy with life and with people around you, you need to start looking into your emotional intelligence. You may find that once you can manage your emotions, you can manage anything in life,” he said.

Emotional intelligence or quotient (EQ), he explained, is a person's “emotional quality”. A person with a high EQ can handle his own emotions well and will be able to manage life well.

“Today, most people take the term EQ to mean one's social popularity or aptness. In actual fact, EQ incorporates a multitude of human capabilities.

“Under the rubric of EQ lies the complexity of a person's competencies to demonstrate intelligent use of emotions for self-management and social integration. People with a positive and high emotional quality are usually popular and are generally happy,” he added.

Another important quality necessary for attaining personal life goals is the ability to suppress the desire for immediate gratifications, an aspect of EQ, stressed Dr Zeng.
He cites author J.K. Rowling who wrote Harry Potter as an example:

“She was divorced, lived with her daughter under public assistance in a tiny apartment and her first book was rejected by 10 publishers. Despite the setbacks, her persistence in pursuing her goal led her to become the best selling author in literary history,”

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SEVERAL WAYS TO MANAGE STRESS ON THE JOB

If you have too much to do and too little time in which to do it; find that the demands of others for your time are in conflict; or spend much of your time fighting "fires," you are probably experiencing excessive stress.

Managers ranked these three situations as the top job-related stressful situations across the country in a study conducted by John Adams, a Washington, D.C., consultant specializing in stress.

The right amount of stress can be a productive source of energy for getting things done, but finding

the right balance is often difficult.

Stress can cause us to "burn out" in a high-pressure job, but "rusting out" in a boring, stagnant one can be just as stressful.

According to some recent research, the stress we experience daily can have a more disastrous, cumulative effect on our health and productivity than an occasional but extremely stressful situation like a death in the family or losing your job.

"But I don't have time to manage stress!" "My stress comes from factors I can't control, so there's nothing I can do about it!"

Sound familiar? It's not surprising.

Most people think that stress management has to involve a large scale lifestyle or job change. (Indeed, in some cases it may be necessary.) But there are little things ail of us can do to relieve the daily stress we must live with.

Managers studied by Adams and others, who have successfully managed their own stress levels, have found several coping strategies that work for them. None of the following techniques takes a great deal of time, but they all require a strong, personal commitment. Decide for yourself.

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